ms inappropriate.

Classical Radio

i do not know what is with my life that almost every single thing that i do, has to go wrong at some point.

and it has totally nothing to do with me!

it is like getting my mails or packages. others get theirs without much trouble, while i have to go through a whole bunch and more waiting before i get them.

or, my name doesn't seem to be on the list whereas everyone's is. whatever happened to my name when i submitted along with everyone else?

or, my stuff is always wrong when everyone has no problem with theirs.

why do i always have to do the extra steps to get things right?

it is like the probability of my things getting right is so low that i actually cheer with joy every time it does. can you imagine how tragic that is?

i am so sick of this.

extremely tired of it.

i get run over anyways, even though i am running away.

i am sorry i get emotional all the time. i am sorry i feel sad all the time. i am sorry i isolate myself when i do. i am sorry i act like a total freak in front of everybody. i am sorry i appear to be a weirdo to you. i am sorry i am forgettable. i am sorry i am not significant. i am sorry people don't appreciate me and the things i do. i am sorry. i will try to be invisible from now on so that i won't become such a nuisance to everyone's life. i am sorry i am causing you all the misery.

often, when i have cried to the point that i am exhausted and about to shut off?

i remind myself before i black out, that one more tear i shed, is one more tear closer to feeling alright again.

ning