today, you came over to my place just to see me. oh how surprised i was to see you at my front gate when i opened the door. not to mention how i was expecting your arrival any time yet you manage to surprise me just like that :)
today, you pulled tantrum at me. at a moment i felt sorry and helpless. then i really felt like crying cause i felt that you were genuinely upset. i held back my tears. it appeared as if i was pulling back a tantrum to get you to talk to me, but my heart was actually aching inside with tears running about in my sockets :'(
today, we played card games that reminded me of the times before we got together. oh how we played that game you thought i was not good at, which i actually always play by luck without any strategy. and when i won our first ever game played against each other, you smiled at me, amazed at my so called hidden talent. i love that smile of yours. it still melts my heart till this very day :')
today, we played another game you taught me in Starbucks about almost ten months ago from today. i obviously lost, because somehow lady luck was never with me whenever i play this game. you named the punishment i dread so much with life, but because you love me, you won't do it on me although i lost both the games ;')
today, cuddling with you means the world to me. with me lying on your arms, with your body heat to warm balance the cold i was feeling, i fell asleep soundly to the angelic scent of your perfume. i fell asleep soundly to the beautiful rhythm of your calm heartbeat. how i sigh to that memorable moment when i fell into dreamland :)
today, knowing how much i am an Elmo fiend, you bought me a whole collection of Elmo themed products. of course, i jumped with joy to the sight of those. and you appeared wearing an Elmo shirt. so it was me, skipping my way to meet your warm hug, something you named panda hug ;)
today, knowing how much i love hugs, you gave me one long one before we bid goodbyes. because i will miss you so much when we are apart, you kiss me long enough for the gentle touch to linger on my mind. long enough to last me till i next see you ^^
today, i stayed outside even after i lost sight of you around the corner, seeing your perfect figure walk out of my sight. because somehow i knew you will drive pass my gate once more so i waited. waited for you to prove me right. oh how you should see the joy in me when you really did in the end. with that charming wave of yours, you can beat Prince William with the mesmerizing charm of yours :D
today, i jumped quickly into the couch where we were lying together at to sniff your scent right from the pillow you lay on. hugging the pillow yet so tight while imagining your presence remained right there beside me, i fell asleep once again, with that smile carved on my face :)
today, i think you are really delectable and sexy when you played with words yet mean every single one of them. oh how you told me not to worry and give everything to you and you will settle it. it made me feel all mushy inside with the amazing feeling of how protective you are over me :')
today, i truly had my wish come true when you told me to leave the wish for myself. little did you know that i already had mine, and it was you. the beautiful you. the you i cannot get enough of
today, just like any other days, i will go to sleep, by imagining you by my side *:)


maliciously pleasurable.

This month has been a naughty one for me. I admite I deserve some spanking in the buttocks.
Highlands getaway was a complete blast. Not to mention some creepy encounter in the midst of all the fun. Some alcohol can really kickstart something. Well, it at least, shed some new light into this relationship, giving new hope and insight. Something I wouldn't forget.
Well, just some little things that you do, are enough, more than enough, to make me all mushy inside. You give me butterflies with the loving care. Gentle, as much as you can pick me up with one hand with much ease. Oh how strong you can be, yet how soft you are around me, so as to make sure you don't bruise me with one touch

The adventure behind a normal date. The ropes, the nets, the flying, the bruises. I would say, not as extreme as I thought it would be, but just sufficient to satisfy my wild heart for extreme sports. Something close to my nature, a monkey in heart.

Here's to something I cherish.
Something to keep nightmares away.


Tonight, I'm walking alone.
Because I know tomorrow, I won't be.

there goes.

Unbroken - Katherine McPhee

It was the 1st of May. It seems like it was yesterday. But hey! Today is the 15th already. Creepy how time flies pass like that. I'm totally in denial. Not to mention how much I slack in blogging these days heh.
Went out with the girls on Saturday and I realized, they are one of the many reasons why I don't want to move on. As Amanda said, she and Cass stuck on almost immediately since day one. Me? Only on the second semester before I slowly got to know Amanda as a person and gradually accepted her as my close friends and now? Beyond describably close :)
It was in the first semester where I knew her as one of the brightest students with a very clear mind on her goals. Need not say, the scented girl. She almost turned me into a dog as I uncontrollably find myself closing on to her and start sniffing her. Whether it was her shampoo, body lotion or the soap powder that she uses, she just smells like vanilla sunshine *likes*
She was the one whom I talk my heart out, even the one whom I feel natural with. With all the telepathy going on (sometimes I do wonder is it cause I have no sense while she does and hence the telepathy) which enable me to associate even better with her. And the Elmo craze I picked up especially this semester, I just love how she plays along with me all the time and makes me feel like a kid again.
Thank you, Amanda Panda!! :) :) :)


As for Cassandra. I got close to her at first because we both shared one similarity - Kiasu. Well, mainly was because we had siblings who were previously in HELP and hence, heard many bad things about how the LAN classes become full almost immediately after registering opens, we ended up in college superb early in the morning, even before the registry opens, to register it. Need not say, one of the first to register for LAN class. It was hilarious.
In our first semester, Cass was the one with the nail polish fiend. Always changing colors and very into coloring her nails. It was cute. Then due to difference in major, we were not in the same classes anymore until last semester for Philosophy. Nevertheless, our bond never break just because of that. We still go out on lunch breaks together :)

The girls. I wish we had more time together before going off to different paths, to pursue our dreams. The girls. I wish.

Yours truly,

i am livid

i am livid and i hate myself am i thinking too much i dont know but this is totally ridiculous i think i am reasonable to think i am not wrong about this because who in the sane mind will think this is normal this is totally not acceptable and i am certainly not accepting this you certainly cannot blame me for this because you led me to thinking this despite me finding umpteen reasons to prove my thoughts wrong but you never gave me a chance you never gave me a break one time after another you have to do this to me i am not a toy and you have to know that i am a human with feelings i am a person with a mind to think for myself many times i chose to give up and in the end i did the otherwise i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid i am livid and it will take forever for me to accept this fact that i a m n o t a t o y

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