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Self-deception;

Thelonious Monk Quartet - Monk in Denmark

Coin toss logic.
I find myself doing these two things:
1. Toss a coin when I am torn in between two or more alternatives.
2. Trying to make the outcome of the coin toss event consistent with my pre-determined decision (if I already have one).
I am actually reading this book that Vania lent to me, "The Honest Truth about Dishonesty" by Dan Ariely, and came across this small section about cheating yourself.
It was describing the logic behind the coin toss concept:
Basically, when you have two options and can't decide on which, you toss a coin to speed up the decision making process. However, sometimes, you already have a decision in your head, but you don't want to admit to it because the other option is as appealing to you as the one that you have decided to go with. Hence, you want to find an 'external' force to help 'determine' your decision.
If the outcome of the coin toss turns out to be consistent with your decision, you go ahead with it, satisfied. No questions asked.
Nevertheless, if the outcome of the coin toss turns out to be inconsistent with your decision, you would probably 'ignore' the first toss, justify why it wasn't reliable (you didn't toss the coin properly, this is just a trial round, etc.) and go for a second round (this time is for real). You would probably do this until the outcome is consistent with your decision. Or, if somehow, probability is against your will, you would probably ignore coin tossing completely and go with your gut feeling, in this case, your initial decision.
"Screw tossing coins, it is just probabilities anyway, I am going with what I have initially decided."
Self-deception much? I suppose so.

Women are generally rather indecisive creatures. Here, you have one, writing to you about the decision making process.
I find myself pretty indecisive at times. For example, I would be standing in Walmart between the shelves, deciding if I should spend the money to buy this Teddy Graham biscuit that I adore, or I should save up the money for better use. Torn in between decisions, I often have the urge to toss a coin to help speed up the decision making process if I am unable to rationalize myself out to a final decision.
I get several people telling me how coin tossing doesn't really solve any problem.
For me, at least it does. For me, at least I don't toss a coin for important life-changing decisions. I leave coin-tossing to small trivial daily matters. To date, it has been working out pretty well for me! While I learn how to decide faster, I would need to rely on coin-tossing for some time. But really, I rarely toss the coin. I only do when there's people around, waiting on my decision.
I digress.
Another option rather than tossing the coin would be talking to a friend about the options you have and 'seek' advice from them. Sometimes, again, when you already have a decision, and if your friend says otherwise, you would probably provide many different reasons to convince your friend to think the same as you, and eventually 'tell' you your desired decision so that you can proceed with the execution of 'his/her' 'decision'.
Complicated? No. You are the culprit behind making things complicated. You are the culprit behind making things go the way you want to.
Self-deception much? I suppose so.

Till you figure out the functions of your complicated mind, good luck!
hint: you never will ;)

Toodleloo~

LeePeiNing

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