overflow;

Gravity by John Mayer

Funny how I seem to like all the songs titled "Gravity"

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Funny how I still find all the weird pictures we took together Hilarious, just like how I would laugh so hard the first time I see them

...

Fall 2012.

Maybe it's me, but I find that we talk more often after Summer.

It has been a year...

I grew more comfortable being around her. She grew more comfortable being around me. We grew more comfortable being around each other.

I will miss the moments where we would debate who would get down from the bed to turn off the lights because the last person forgets to turn it off before getting into snuggling under covers.

I will miss the moments where we would continue our pillow talk in the dark, sharing our thoughts, experiences, childhood memories, high school middle school memories, etc. We would share a piece of our philosophy of life, sigh at unfortunate events, grateful for fortunate ones. From each other, we learnt to appreciate, love, and be thankful.

By the way, did I mention how we find solace in talking to each other, just because our outlook of life is at least, more similar to one another than to others?

We would talk, and talk, and talk, and talk, and talk... 

until silence prevails... 

until sweet dreams twinkle

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Softly As I Leave You by Michael Buble 

She came back from China with something that made me smile, every single time I look at it. And nope, I am not exaggerating. I mean every time :)

Cute little socks. Oh... *melts*

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September 2012. Chasing tornadoes. Continuing our love for photography, we set out with our cameras, despite the many tornado alerts and high wind speed.

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September 2012. Sunrise date. We planned this. Yet, we went to bed late at night, praying that we can pull ourselves out of bed in a few hours time.
"Tian! Woah! Azuzu went to see the sunrise." (referring to pictures on Facebook)
"Yeah..."
{pause}
"Pei Ning..."
"Mmmm?"
"Do you want to go see the sunrise tomorrow?"
"How?"
"Go to CCC."
"You drive?"
"Yeah."
"Is it okay for you to drive when it is still dark?"
"Should be..."

We did anyway :)

Tried to take some jump shots, we were never synchronized! After more than 50 shots (nope, again, I am not exaggerating), this was I guess the best shot that we have together.
Of course, we were exhausted after. Gave up, went back.
Satisfied.
满载而归 :)

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Someone to Watch Over Me by Ella Fitzgerald

Fall. Autumn.

Leaves were beautiful. She, as usual, captured the moments ;)

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In our new room, 120A Adirondack Hall, we shared many crazy room moments :D

We let our dogs have conversation with each other while we have ours,

We play footsies too... only a little differently :)

Chicken from Walmart as dinner, just because we can. Indulgence, in a form it was.

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Thinking About You by Norah Jones

We made a lot more crazy faces together this semester. Pictures that I still laugh at when I look at.

These are the ones that I'll never forget.

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We dressed up for Presidents' Gala :)

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At Last by Beyonce

December 2012. Finals week. Of course, it had to be the three of us, omma, her and me, spending late nights in the library. We were productive! We had to. Nevertheless, in the midst of information cramming, late night snacking, we made good use of our procrastination times by doing some stress relieving activities:

1. Taking pictures.

2. Silly faces.

3. Playing childhood games.

Fun times!

... until Fall semester ended

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Goodbye Fall 2012.

Till then,

...

Regressing,

Spring 2012.

It came soon after I was back from Minnesota and Iowa, she, back from China.

Our adventure continues...

Dream A Little Dream of Me by Louis Armstrong

Rainy days like this makes people more sentimental.

At least for me, it has that magical effect
.

We have different humor points, but we always seem to converge on each other when it comes to interest, thoughts, or even actions :)

Like the Chinese proverbs: 心有灵犀一点通

That's what we are...

She's the Yin to my Yang :)
,

I will miss her magic hands of cleaning up the room swiftly.
From this,

To this.

Just within a matter of a few moments...
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She makes silly faces using her phone app,

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She comforts me when my jeans gave up on me.

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I'll never forget our Starbucks moments :)

She treated me a nice cup of Mocha Cookie Crumble Frappuchino on this beautiful day of May.

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Of course, time flies...

Spring semester came to an end. We took a trip down to NYC together on Amtrak, bid each other goodbyes in Penn Station for the Summer. We almost teared, like many other times saying goodbye to each other :')

Room 120D Adirondack Hall.

Goodbye. Our times together were wonderful

,

Spring 2012.

Till then, my dearest.

...

le rendezvous;

Don't Want An Ending by Sam Tsui

Life. Ironic, isn't it?

Was thinking about my beloved roommate when this came shuffled onto my playlist on Pandora

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Fall 2011.
August 2011. I first made her acquaintance. I found out after that after going a month plus without any Chinese around her, provided with her English deficiency, she was enthusiastic to finally be able to join the Fall International Student Orientation, finally be able to meet some Chinese, only to be disappointed by my lack of Chinese conversation with her :(

The very next morning...

I was entering Adirondack Hall when I caught sight of Chihiro Kobayashi, her orientation leader, speaking to her down the hallway. I remember vividly how I hesitated, whether to walk over to strike up a conversation, or to proceed back to my room as I initially intended to. I shuffled down the hallway to my right in the end to meet them. The restlessness in both their pretty faces made me realized that I have made a pretty bad decision of joining them.

After several moments of casual conversation, they finally broke to me that she was having trouble with her roommate, Visa (签证), and was looking to switch roommates. Seeing that just the morning before I left for activities, my roommate moved in and made a pretty bad impression (waking me up with noises of her moving in, then quarreling with her parents over the phone with rude attitude), I promptly agreed to be roommate with her.

Ha! I still remember the look on her face. Wide eyes of disbelief with hints of relief.

"Really? Really?"

"Yeah! I can be your roommate."

"Really?"

"Mmhmm..."

Boy, she plunged into me like she won the powerball lottery :)

There, our journey began.

...

New York, New York by Frank Sinatra

I had help moving into our new room, 120D Adirondack Hall. I helped her after. Witnessed 签证 in action. I see why she wants to move out! 签证 had her cupboard drawer open, blocking 2/3 of the doorway entrance, didn't offer any help, expecting us to move things out of the room through that 1/3 space she left us. That's evil in action.

Next day, she moved her fridge when I was not around, hurt her feet, got stitches. It was ugly when I saw her again later in the afternoon. Funny how she put 签证 in the blame for her injury.

"签证 used black magic on me. See what became of me!"

Hahahahaha. She always makes me laugh
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We stuck together like glue soon after we became roommates. Since her vocabulary was not strong enough, guess how we communicate? The guessing game :P
All the adorable sound effects that she would make, I'm the person who guesses. Sometimes, if she recognizes the word, she would point at me excitedly with that grin on her face. Sometimes, if she doesn't know what the word I said, I would have to explain, more explaining, then I would finally give in and say it in Chinese. If I don't know the Chinese word to it, Google comes in to save the day.
Our relationship then? People would say, amazing.
Of course, we developed our unique way of communicating with each other :)
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Beyond The Sea by Kevin Spacey

Our first adventure together: Bubble wand :)

Yes! She was unpacking and I saw this bubble wand of hers. I wanted to play so she grabbed my camera and we went out to have a little fun. It was then, I discovered her love for photography. She's a pretty passionate photographer herself. She loves to take pictures of other people. Candid.

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Our first pictures together... ♥

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September 2011. I bought a huge pack of gummy bear. We camwhored with the gummy fountain :)

October 2011. Halloween. We went costume shopping, albeit not buying anything.

Halloween night. Look at all the candies we collected around the neighborhood!

November 2011. Our first outing together. We went to Burlington, following the trip organized by International Student Services (ISS). We shared bubble tea. We played with colorful shades. We had fun.

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November 2011. It was ice-skating day with the original Mow group. She didn't join us in the rink, just sat around in the bench and took many great pictures of others having fun. I couldn't bear leaving her alone, away from everyone else, since I convinced her to join us in the Field House. I went to sit with her. We took pictures of course :)

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I Think It Is Going To Rain Today by Norah Jones

November 2011. First Plattsburgh snowfall together. We are random. No. She is random. So it was our first time experiencing snowfall together, as roommates. The first time for me was during Thanksgiving break, when she was away.
"Pei Ning, it is snowing outside."
"Yeah I know."
{pause}
"Want to go out to take pictures?"
"Now?"
"Yeah."
"Its two something in the morning now!"
"Yeap."
"Okay..."
So we geared up and we out with her cameras. While she experimented with her new Leica toy, I fooled around with her Casio magic camera :)

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December 2011. She and Omma gave me my first birthday party, Elmo themed. I cried. I cried so bad like a sad, sad child. Of course, it not only caught me off guard, my 'grief' caught everyone off guard as well. I was too happy. Tears of joy. I was touched.

Semester ended shortly after.
Goodbye Fall 2011

...

behind drawn curtains;

Ego by Beyonce

Curtains drawn. Play begins. Standing ovation

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EOP Summer Institute 2012 was incredible, to begin with. Never knew what I signed up for, never knew what to expect. People ask me why.

"Merely to fill in my Summer that is."

Used to tell everyone that this is a job. First day into training, completely changed my perception about this "job" that I signed up for. A "career" instead. A "passion".

Poised and adept, all of my team members. Conflict free, focused on supporting and educating the young sprouts of SUNY Plattsburgh.
The end was nearing. The end has come. The end is gone.
"I will now announce who made it and who didn't. When your name is called, please meet me in the EOP office right after supper." Michele proceeded back to her seat and sat down, uttered no words. Cheers filled the entire dining room. Emotions overflowed. Goosebumps surfaced. I scurried towards the back of the food area where there was no one and started crying. Tears streaked my face. Happy tears. Speechless, overwhelmed, proud.
Is this the feeling every teacher gets, whenever his/her students succeed? If it is, I absolutely adore this feeling of accomplishment, this feeling of pride. Hugs never get old in occasions like this. I wept like I was one of the students, who made it through the four weeks of hell in a program similar to that of a boot camp, who is able to come back to SUNY Plattsburgh in the Fall as a fully matriculated college student

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The banquet was the event of recognition. Seeing each one of them go up front to receive their certificate of completion, I couldn't be more elated. Of course, tutor counselors were recognized as well; first timers girls each got a personalized bracelet engraved with EOP 2012 and name, boys each got a personalized dog tag, returners get personalized USB Drive, Cassie, most senior of all, got a personalized photo album.

Can't thank Matt more, our beloved Program Coordinator. Each team member chipped in a small amount of money to get him a bike rack he yearned for. A small and insignificant token compared to the amount of hard work that man put in throughout this program.

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Farewell was never easy. Cried so bad. Felt like a piece of my heart was breaking apart from the whole as I waved each white van goodbye while seeing its red tail lights disappear into the silent, somber night.

Will be waiting for everyone's return. Will be seeing everyone on campus this coming Fall.

Soon. Very soon.

Toast to my new found family,

Hopeful,

Evelyn

amazing death;

Into The New World by SNSD

I knew I have a passion for this. I knew I have a passion to help people

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Classes went great. In fact, tutoring was better. It is where all the things get real. I love the communication, I love the interaction.

Working with these three Chinese students gave me a lot to think about. They are learning from me, but at the same time, I am learning from them and learning from myself.

I love and appreciate the heart to heart pillow talk under the tree behind Macomb Hall with them in the warm afternoon. Seeing the tears of helplessness and relief fall down all at the same time was overwhelming. I can and cannot imagine being in their shoes. It must be so tough and miserable for them to go through this ordeal of having to learn, deal and communicate with other people in a foreign language that you were given a limited time and resources to learn and expected to be phenomenal at it.

My throat died tonight for one reason - to make sure that these three students succeed. That was all that matters. It was the satisfaction that I get at the end of it. A satisfaction that goes beyond just being able to help them in their studies. I was literally explaining every sentence of the reading of "Thinking As A Hobby" by William Golding to them, repeating my explanation over and over again slowly to make sure that they understand the words coming out of my mouth. However, at the same time I was doing all the talking and explanations, I was amazed at my ability to comprehend myself. I was intrigued at the amazing content that I was able to discover as I go through the reading in depth. I had goosebumps and chills playing catching at the back of my spine. The feeling was incredible. This feeling

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Tutoring ended at 10pm. Came back at 10.30pm. The first thing I wanted to do was to shower but curfew was at 11pm so I had to wait. When it was all finally done, Matt called me on a trip to University Police to get an ice pack for a girl who sprained her ankle. Finally! I was in the nice shower. The water was colder than I wanted it to but it would not heat up, just like how it was the past few days. As I was completely covered in soap, I saw some light flashing at the top of the ceiling and I vaguely hear some sounds that was somewhat like a fire alarm to me. Took me quite some moment before I came to my senses that cuss words started spewing out of my mouth.

"This is not happening! THIS IS NOT HAPPENING! F***!"

I was panicking in the shower trying to wash all the soap away from my body. Was literally scooping the bubbles out of the way. I was traumatized. Seeing that I am a tutor counselor and definitely not being able to strut out of the building wrapped in my towels, I had to run back upstairs and put some clothing on. Well, there I was, scurrying out in my jean jacket and Adidas pants with my hair dripping wet towards where all the other TCs, Food and Wellness coordinators, the Program Coordinator and the rest of the students. That was my walk of shame. Nevertheless, I believe everyone took pity on me.

Speak about FML

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Tuition fees was put out officially today. It went up A LOT! This is so not happening to me and all the students. This is so unfair! Speak about FML again.

Here it is. Ending my night in such a depressing and miserable way.

Just trying to be a little more optimistic, I took a long nap today, which was something rare as a pink diamond. Moreover, I will be having my night off tomorrow so I could rest. No tutoring for me to miss so everyone else is not missing out on much as well. Hmm...

I guess it is time to wash up and go to bed now that I just hard cored drying my hair and it is good enough for bed.

Till then!

Love, 

Pei Ning

melt;

Better In Time by Leona Lewis

Praises.

These things work magic. They are miraculous.

Unfortunately, this is not something very common from where I grew up. Now that is cultural differences. Since young, I hardly receive praises from anyone. Teachers, friends.

Well, I have very good parents. They were very supportive of me. They praise me for my achievements, they do not condemn me of my failure but merely give me motivational advices.

The funny thing about my parents is that they are EXTREMELY afraid that I might turn out mentally challenged. My siblings are undeniably intelligent. As the youngest among my siblings, I am often reminded of that pressure to "keep up the good work" whenever they come home with some amazing achievements. I am always flabbergasted by how they manage to be such achievers.

The fact is that my parents see that in me, my burning desire to do as good as my siblings or better. They know that failing is not an option for me. They know it. And that is why they are so afraid that I might be too hard on myself that I go crazy or something. Certainly, they do not wish to receive a phone call in the middle of the night from my school, all the way from the United States, saying that their daughter has ended up in an asylum or what not.

Believe me or not, they even had this conversation about committing suicide with me.

"Pei Ning, we spent so many years, so much money, raising you so that you can be a great person. If only one day you decide to commit suicide, all our efforts, poof, gone. Not only that, along with those investments we had in you, there comes feelings and love. If only one day you decide to commit suicide, mummy and daddy will be very sad ohhhhh..."

Yeap. There you go. Those words, straight forward it may sound, but it is true. Those words are right there, carved in my heart. This means so much more than just a simple message of not committing suicide when you give up on life. This means to stay strong and pull through hell hole.

On the side note, I cracked open a fortune cookie that says: "Bravery is the capacity to pull through even though you are scared to death."

Coming to the United States certainly is challenging. All around me are people who came from different cultural backgrounds. The Americans. They are very honest and direct. They see each other, they greet each other. "Hey. What's up?" "Hey how's it going?" "Hey. How are you?" Well, till now I am still getting used to replying to those questions. Most of the time, I had to think for a long while before replying "good", which ends the conversation and makes people think I am weird. Truth is, we're different. I am not used to this.

In America, people do Rock Paper Scissors Shoot. In Malaysia, we do Scissors Paper Stone

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This Summer in EOP, I open my eyes up to more things. The learning process never ends and this is what makes life so interesting. It is still five days into the program and it is still training period, but I am already loving this program. I am praised by my colleagues all the time and I am certainly learning to praise other people and trying to feel comfortable and natural with it. I am trying. I am learning.

Yesterday was my first time playing a real volleyball game and I am already loving it! The experience is certainly different from playing it back in high school. The ball is lighter and it doesn't hurt as bad as the ones from high school. Not to mention that I sprained my hand somehow in the process of it. However, being the person who loves sports, I was doing rather okay I would say. My colleagues were extremely supportive of me, constantly praising me and giving me second tries or reassurances when I mess up. I adore the feeling of it.

"Yo people! Evelyn's a natural man! She's a natural!"

"That was good man. That was good."

"No don't worry about it. It is just a game."

"Don't worry Evelyn. We don't play money in this game."

Every time someone starts to be too focused on the game and breaking up the spirits in sports, we get people to remind everyone that we should not forget that we are just playing to have fun. I absolutely adore this kind of learning environment. I just think it is very stimulating and keeps the team spirit high. It keeps you motivated and hopeful.

Matt, the program coordinator, he praised me several times when we are playing game and after.

"Something about Evelyn is that she is always willing to try new things." "And she is good at stuff!" Chris said. That made me melt happily inside.

Partnered with Matt several times and he's really supportive of the team. It feels great because you know deep down that he has your back. I just love the honesty and appreciation that one can benefit from being in this kind of positive and stimulating learning environment. It just makes you want to keep on going and succeeding in your role and responsibilities.

For now, I really can't wait for the students to come in and see what this team can bring to the table. At the same time, I would love to see what I can achieve and witness for myself how much I have learned and to be able to put the things I have learned throughout training period into great use. I am really looking forward to this Summer and see what comes.

This might sound a little too confident but...

BRING IT!

:P

That's me right there.

That's right.

I am a perfectionist.

Pei Ning

EOP Summer Institute Program 2012

Young Forever by The Ready Set

My first intention on signing up for this program is just to fill up my Summer. Instead of doing nothing, I want to do something.

Honestly, I had no idea what I signed up for. I had no idea what this program was about, what I'll be going through and even my responsibilities. I am just completely dumb and blind about my Summer job. And this was not long before, when I still call this - a job.

A Summer job

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I would say it has been a great lunch outing and a mere 24 hours prior to moving into Macomb Hall that I finally discover a new shade to this 'job' that I signed up for. Turns out, I actually signed up for something, way beyond my expectations that actually caught me off guard. Not to mention, they gave the staff single rooms :P

This whole Summer Institute actually has greater meaning than I thought it did just this morning when I woke up to Flo-rida. This program, despite being this mere first day of training (more like an introduction), seems like it is going to exciting and might even provide me one hell of an experience to my already interesting college life in the States.

I have been hearing great feedbacks about this program from former staffs and students and especially from the EOP office staffs that have been involved in this program for the past few years. I think this is going to be real fun, albeit some down and depressing moments that we will face along the way but this is life! Isn't it? Not every moment is glorious and smooth-sailing.

I am starting to feel it. Beginning to be attached to this program and the people that I will be working with for the next month to come. The experience that I had on this first day (and it is not completely over yet), is already mind-blowing and motivating.

One piece of advice that I got from Michele Carpentier was that we have to look back into history and be grateful for what we have right now. The opportunities and privileges that were given to us through someone else's sacrifices. "People actually died fighting for what we have right now." I just thought that was really inspiring.

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Well, the position that I am at right now, I am going to think twice before calling this a job that I signed up for unknowingly.

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. - William James

Till then,

A date with the sky.

SUNY Buffalo has been pretty amazing.

Pretty sky. Pretty sunset. Pretty people.

Gotta love it

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I have fallen for the Niagara Falls for the second time in a month's time. That place should be heaven to be able to steal my breath away.

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Finally, my Summer adventure has come to an end. In about two hours time I will take the cab and head down to the train station. An hour after I board the train, the sun will rise again and it will be a brand new day that I will be receiving with warm hearts in my light sleep on the train.

On the side note: It is now 1.11am.

Erie Canal Harbor was such a pretty place. The lighthouse was so dreamy and perfect, despite the fact that we failed to go to but to only enjoy from afar. The adventurous journey did bring in some surprises that may not be fanciful but definitely memorable. We were just extremely glad to have made the rebellious decision and survived the dangerous mission that we undertook unnecessarily. After all, I felt like I could do anything in the world and it certainly gave me that boost of confidence that I have been seeking for in a long time.

The day ended perfectly with a detour to McDonalds where I treated myself with a nice cup of ice-cream sundae and two pieces of chicken nuggets that I fished out from Thaddeus'. The bliss was certainly indescribable as I felt like I was reliving my childhood again.

I am really thankful for this trip as this is a perfect time for me to travel around, meet up with my friends and get an ample amount of rest that I need before my Summer job starts on the 2nd of July.

Till then folks. I apologize for the lack of update. Haven't been getting the time and inspiration on my writing fingers :)
I wish I have more inspiration because I really would love to record down all my lovely memories, especially those in my university years studying in the United States.

Lovely,

Pei Ning